I must rant, and I must rant because I know there are so many other people out there who deal with this issue....weight and self image. Sure I’m a little overweight~I’m 5'4" and weight 155 pounds. I’ve even lost a couple of pounds in the last few months without dieting. I have one friend in particular who is about 30 pounds heavier who continually tells me I should go see her diet doctor. A co-worker yesterday, who while she is normally insane about everything, who took my measurements and based on a chart she was using said I am borderline obese (she happens to weigh 190)? WTF...! Both these ladies are trying to loose weight. While I have expressed a slight desire to eat healthier here and there, I have not said that I want to go on a diet etc. etc.
I have some pretty big fish to fry right now. I am dealing with gaining more and more momentum of living without a substance that helped me cope, or so I thought. Can I not do this first for Christ’s sake? Can people not mind their own F’in body business. Some people are so uncomfortable with people who can accept themselves as they are at the moment. As women in this society, we are supposed to want to constantly diet, share diets, exercise together, compare pounds lost. Well I say Fuck that! Sorry for the language. I would like to loose 10-15 pounds, I think that is reasonable. I would like to start going for walks regularly and be consistent with it, and even maybe enjoy it. But I want to do these on my own terms and in my own time.
Is it not better to stand in front of the mirror in your towel and ask yourself to appreciate your natural breasts, your full hips, your little bit o’ fullness? Like a renaissance painting? Is this ok to work on coming to terms with yourself inside and how you view yourself instead of trying to make your outside match everyone else’s?
It bugs me. We have criticized ourselves enough, pushed ourselves to slight insanity and self loathing, we don’t need others to f’up our agenda in trying to cultivate a little self love, taking it easy on ourselves and some self acceptance. And.....learning to tell those whose outside doesn’t match our insides to take a hike. Blah, blah, blah...that is all. Thanks for reading.
~Jenny
3 comments:
Namaste sister Jenny, a most wonderful rant. Imagine if everyone were to care more about love and unity than they do about money and looks.
How do I loose 20 pounds? Should I have cosmetic surgery? How does my hair look? Do you think I'm pretty?
Can you imagine these mental morons asking themselves; Why do I exist? How do I love myself and others unconditionally? What is reality? How can I understand ego, then free myself from it's grasp? What is the meaning of all this?
End of the day sister Jenny, garbage in and garbage out. People feed themselves with television and wonder why their life is such a mess. They never seek perfection from within so all they can rely on is what their eyes can perceive.
I have known you sister for quite some time. I have followed your thoughts; sharing in both your joy and pain. You are a spirit seeking truth Jenny. I see in you a divine goddess. Whether you know what you are looking for or not, I know it will come soon to you. Continue to be free in your mind and heart. Let no fool set borders or conditions on the ultimate and unconditional love you should have for your self. From a pure love of self you will open the hearts of others too weak to ask the right questions. Tell your diet friend she could do with shedding a few pounds of ego off the rear end.
In Lak' ech, sister Jenny, hey you leave my sister alone...
ahhh thank you Christopher. Very true. I wish people would focus more on what is in their hearts and less on what is seen in the world. You are a kindred spirit. Thank you for your kind words and for your wisdom.
Many Blessings to you~
Ranting is good. And this is a great rant. All in all it's just another brick in the wall...
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