Friday, October 29, 2010

Perpetual Motion (thinking outloud)

Could perpetual motion be used for space travel?
I keep envisioning something like a gyroscope
it releases a tremendous amount of unseen
but what would we use?
What would it be made of?
Solids, liquids, gas?
maybe a long rod
with bars on each end
one slightly higher than the other
with metal balls on the end of each
contained in a casing
A lite amount of energy
to get it going
could produce
a build up
of energy
than the amount of energy
to start it
whatever it is
would it encompass the ship?
Would it be in an engine
inside the ship?
It could be contained
at the back of the ship
with an outlet
that would push
the ship
through space
at increasing speeds
always the same amount
of energy
in the container
to keep the perpetual motion going
but a valve to control
the amount of energy released
No fuel needed
unlimited power
to hurtle us through space
and continue
on a journey
to who knows where
and make it home


After writing this I did some research and noticed on-line that someone created a perpetual motion machine in September by using gravity.  If we were able to create one for space travel, perhaps it could also be used as a way to supply gravity within the ship.  I thought it was funny though that at the end of the article we have this

"The machine will not be patented in full; the patent office could register different parts of the AOGFG but not the machine in totality. This because the machine’s claimed to be a perpetual motion machine that produces more energy than it consumes, and machines such as this are considered to break the first law of thermodynamics – “This states that energy can be changed from one form to another, but cannot be created or destroyed.” But still in all hopes we wish such a machine is real to answer our energy woes."

Well I say phooey on the law of Thermodynamics. (sorry to a certain scientist I know)

Here is a picture of the machine from the article and a link:
(I'm terrible at links, so if this doesn't work just copy and paste)

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Thursday 5pm

I would like to be somewhere
somewhere I can
drink a beer..or two
eat peanuts out of a bag
throw the shells on the floor
and smoke a few cigarettes
....all at the same time.


Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Dead Poets

pardon me
I do not mean to judge
the greats
of the greats
but should they be heroes
forever in literary eternity
those who picked a vice
and perfected it until the end
choosing to stay there
and pen it down
with the only evolution
within that vice
and not evolution
into a different
state of being
or reality
while we are in their place
they are our heroes
but their glory fades
for those
who move out of it
however slowly
and we look for some other form
of nourishment
for where it is
we find ourselves now.


A Quote From The Master

“I don’t know if I’m forgetting things, or if I just can’t remember.” ~Matt Jakositz

Thoughts For A Wednesday

I saw a homeless man sitting on an off ramp on the way to work today.  I had seen him the day before too.  I pondered giving him some money, but while I try to decide if this is someone taking advantage of everyone or not, the light always changes and there is no time to stick my hand out the window.  I don’t have much to give, so I try to be careful if I do give anything it would go to someone who is really down on their luck, or really needs it.  But I suppose this isn’t for me to decide-so says God.  Today, there was a police man behind me as the homeless man sat in front of a sign that read “no soliciting.”  He sat there with headphones, his sign, and a bucket with a rock in it that he used as a drum.  On the loud speaker, the police man told him to move on in not so many words.  I saw the homeless man hang his head down, almost embarrassed and shake his head yes, as if he knew he was really not supposed to be there—according to law.

But was he supposed to be there according to universal law?  Do we make these laws so we do not have to worry about the feelings I described above? So we do not have to make the choice for ourselves on whether or not we should lend a helping hand? Out of sight, out of mind? To save us from our guilt if we do not?  I almost wanted to give him something even though just for the fact that he was being told to move on.

Sure, we can think–why doesn’t he just get a job, or there are avenues set up within the government to help feed him and perhaps even teach him the skills to get him on his feet to start a self sufficient life.  But I think some are incapable.  And as I thought this this morning, my mother’s words rang in my head.  She says “Jesus said that the poor will always be with you.” And they will.  They will always be among us, and we will always be forced to make a decision about what we would like to do about that personally.  Sometimes within the time it takes for a light to change from red to green.


Tuesday, October 26, 2010

I'm adding this to my bucket list.


here we have turtle
transformed from hare
after numerous hunts
being chased by foxes
and men on horses
fur flying everywhere
chemicals of fear
released from skin
through glands
into the air

yes, here we have turtle
she is slow
unlike hare

turn her over
and observe her soft underside
do not poke with a stick
or examine too closely
just look
and see that the shell
is softer
more vulnerable
than the hardness on top
it is smooth and light colored
it is vulnerable
and secret

she is very slow
turtle takes her time
perhaps she is just tired
turtle is closer to the ground

notice how turtle
retreats with her head
and legs into her shell
when danger is near

she is wise
and very old
yes, here we have turtle
touch lightly


Monday, October 25, 2010


It seems
she was born
with big shoes
bigger than her feet
which lay inside
which were quite small
quite small indeed
the shoes
a cross between
a clowns
work boots
they were lighthearted
yet served a purpose
and sometimes
due to their
immense size
in relation
to her small feet
unable to really feel
and control
the contraptions
at times
stepped on toes
as she clomped around
this big round earth
shared with those
who mostly wore shoes
that fit
or else
ran around bare foot


Thursday, October 21, 2010

Afternoon Poem

What mellow words
roll off your tongue
I am searching for
the perfect combination
of meaning with sounds
that are so pleasing
they send a shock
of pleasure
to an unknown place
in your body
or outside of it
words like
the pontification
of the precipice



I can't write Haiku
I can't write Haiku for you
no Haiku for you


Today's News Headline Poetry

fury grows in France
tainted celery
man saved by God
Larry King
Jon Stewart
a potty plan
past spurs
secret pilots
credit score
for $0


Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Wisdom From Star Trek

Rule #1:  Never disobey a direct order from the captain, unless you are planning a mutiny. The ship and your duties will run much smoother if you adhere to the rules--regardless if you agree with the captain or not.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Taking Chances

You need something that can really make you feel.
You’ve been gone so long, when are you coming home.
You need nature, you need God, you need the stars.
You need warmth and safety, you need us to tell you it
will all be alright.
Just let us handle it, trust us.
Trust Us.

~The Angels

(going through the writings I have saved on my computer at work, after reading this I heard a voice say "when was the last time you took a chance?" It's been so long, I almost cried.  Maybe it's time.)

WWPD (what would Pippi do)

If you want ta know what I’d do, I’ll tell you what I’d do,I would go on playing in my big yellow house
and pretending all sorts of things,
putting on grown up make-up,
telling my friends I’ve flown to the moon and won’t be back,
bake some creme cakes and throw them at thieves,
throw myself a birthday party and take an extra cromulus pill
so that I never ever have to grow up and worry about silly things,
like DNA tests and taxes and such.
I would run away from home for a while on old man
and have picnics with Tommy and Annika,
and feed the mayor dandelions,                       
and learn new cuss words that I could whisper in people’s ears.
That’s what I would do.
Go on being my happy Pippi self and not worrying about the future,
or caring what anyone else thinks.
It’s all the same to me.


Group Photo

here we have
a misch mashed
assembly of faces
in this picture
with inaccurate
each one
worn down
by years
of ludicrous
mumbo jumbo
hands tired
and eyes too
from searching for answers
for countless years
where there are none
feeling around
in the dark
standing on words
spoken by one woman
who thought
she had a vision
and maybe she did
but that foundation
is crumbling
into a terrible pile
of regret
and years gone
waiting for an answer
for some confirmation
that we were all
supposed to be here for so long
it’s like the god dammed mob
a force so strong
of doubt and fear
of comfort and complacency
that gets more powerful
with each year
stole past each of us
until the calendar changes over
and we are all still here
with tired faces
unsure voices
negative energies
and you have to wonder
was this a blessing
or was this a curse
is there any other way out
than to just say, enough
and walk away
and have faith
that God will handle
the rest


Thursday, October 14, 2010

Sad day, sad day
give other people
the short end of the stick
because they
don’t have enough stick
to get through in this life
and the ones that get the short end
have more than enough
for everybody
but it just doesn’t seem right
...doesn’t seem right
I will miss you friend
and wish you everything
that is the best of the best
of the best
that you ever wanted.
Free at last
free at last
God Almighty
your free at last
bittersweet day, bittersweet day

"Sooner or later you will have to put God first in your life, God must become the only thing that really matters.  It need not be and better not be the only thing in your life, but it must be the first thing. When that happens your life becomes simple, richer and infinitely more worthwhile." ~Emmet Fox

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Today's News Headline Poetry

Obama weight
stunning new pictures
of galaxies in America
mental-health gangsters
taxing Marijuana
man suffers partial



I went a little crazy sometimes
not because something was wrong with me
but because I have the human condition
like everyone else
I was in love
and when your in love
you can't see straight
and do all kinds of stupid
desperate things
I have learned to not be so hard on myself
for decisions
I made in my life
after all
I chose not to stay married to someone
that was dishonest with me
that was possibly being unfaithful
so I got a divorce
rather than enduring years of a lie
and he was set free
to live the life he wanted
and so was I
I chose every relationship
or my heart
and the human condition
of love
chose for me
but I chose to leave each of those
when it was no longer working
and the cost of maintaining them
just for the sake of maintaining them
I feel would have been far greater
than the pain and the turmoil
of pulling out
and each of them
were free
and able
to go on to their destinies
as was I
and that’s good
that’s very good
now I just have to start seeing
how good it was for me, also
how many blessings
have come about
by being released of those contracts
by circumstance
there may be those
who are jealous
that I do not have a mortgage
car payment
I used to fault myself for these things
now, I see them as a blessing
and while these things
can bring blessings
in their own ways
there is a price to pay
as with everything
I consciously chose
to make my life a different one
and today
I do not regret it
and do not want to be ostracized for it
or have it thought
that my problems
or daily life
are somehow less
than yours because of the lack of these things
I had the weight of my choices
and so did you
you chose differently
and our choices
are no ones fault
not even our own
but their fruits
must be managed
sorted and eaten
by ourselves



"I have learned to live each day as it comes, and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow.  It is the dark menace of the future that makes cowards of us."  ~Dorothy Day

I have noticed that when things start piling up I get overwhelmed, and instead of setting out to tackle them--I panic and freeze, because I don't know where to start--I want to do it all tomorrow--and then things pile up worse and I panic and freeze more and then stress about what is not getting done and needs my attention and hard work.  I do this with everything--I'm a freezer and a runner. My momma once said to me "how do you eat an elephant?--one bite at a time."  These words have been going round in my head for days, reminding me that if I just make a start of the pile of things on my desk, and take care of one at a time eventually it will become more manageable,  the same for huge goals, relationships, life changing situations that need to be started on. So I can eat that bite at a time.....

(why does the best advice from my family always have to do with animals---if you stop feeding "stray cats" they will stop coming around---if you lye down with dogs, you'll get up with flees---hickeys are like an animal pissing on it's territory---don't let yourself be pecked to death by ducks--)


Tuesday, October 12, 2010

In Another Life

In an alternate universe today
I am a bartender
or patron
waking up at 12:00pm
to start my shift
arriving to serve
all the drunks
who don’t have a job
or have the day off
or have a job
but woke up with a bad case
of the “fuck its’
and called in
I am rail thin
with tight jeans
and a tank top
serving cool glasses
of “we don’t care no more”
with Sweet Home Alabama
or Magic Carpet ride
pouring out of the juke box
and people playing
some stupid
video poker game
or lottery
or dwindling away
their well fare checks
student loans
or hard earned money
and it’s dark in there
and no one knows it’s daylight
on a Tuesday morning
or afternoon
the next customer
walks in the door
and the light comes pouring in
as a dim reminder
that all the good people of the world
are “hosing and scrubbing their cars
on their lunch hour”
or putting on their monkey suits
to conquer the ficticious jungle
one more day
and my laugh is cackly
and I cuss...a lot
and they buy me shots
of smooth comfort
and I belong to a biker gang
with something like
“Scars Lady”
on my jacket
and talk
about the ride this weekend
and everyone talks
about nothing of importance
and nothing in particular
except their old man
old lady
or baby daddy
or baby momma
and how their being done
so wrong
but for the moment
feel so right


Friday, October 8, 2010

All children are born artists. The problem is to remain an artist as we grow up.
- Pablo Picasso

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Halloween Box

they say death is a lonely business
well divorce is a nasty business
sorting through the box
taken out of storage
fucking years
that I keep all of these things
tied up with my favorite holiday
I sorted through everything
and finally threw out
what I needed too
I threw away his Frankenstein costume
a Halloween snow globe
that had been rotting
teddy bear mummies
that had no place
a half burned coffin candle
and a burned down to wires
bloody Halloween hand
for the first time
I put out the pumpkin lights
my sister gave me
kept the wizard Snoopy
with his broken crystal ball
he’s part of me,
but he doesn’t work anymore
that’s ok
the feeling of relief
to put in the dumpster
what needed to be let go of
I felt like a new person
but stood there
who this girl is now
with the dark hair again
trying to recreate her life
realizing it cannot be recreated
it has to be something new
something now
mixed in with the best
of who I was then
divorce takes a small portion
of your heart out
and it can take years
to grow back
and when it does grow back
it is still tender
like the new skin
over a wound
and you have to be careful of it
not to bump it
on something sharp
and reopen it
it took mine 13 years to grow back
13 years of my life


Tuesday, October 5, 2010

This concludes my pity party and emotionally throwing up on my blog for the day. Thanks for attending, you're welcome to join me next time.


She comes through the door in the morning
lit up like a Christmas tree
“I like your moon” I tell her.
“thank you”
“I like your pets too,
and your oceans and your forests
are beautiful
and I love it when you sigh
at the end of the day.
I like all of your clothes,
you always wear the latest fashions
with each season.”
“Your too kind,” she says.
“Your very welcome, mother earth.”

September 1st, 2008
The day is long and sweet and good.

"After all, we are human beings, we are born full of guilt, we feel terrified when happiness becomes a real possibility, and we die wanting to punish everyone else because we fell impotent, ill used and unhappy."
~~Ralph Hart, Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho.

Sometimes I feel terribly misunderstood to myself and others. I write how I think but I don't always say how I think. I hear a child outside today call for their mother over and over again and it makes my milk run.  I did not know I still had that in me. Why do people leave their children.  Maybe we don't know what a reality it is until we witness it. It feels so good to have been away from work these last few days.  It's sick there. I hate it.  I want to be somewhere else.  I think I would feel happier and free somewhere else. I have to get out of there.  It represents stagnation.  I want to conquer my spirit--not just survive in the world anymore.

"He told me that I was someone who wasn't afraid of pain, and that was good, because in order to master the soul one must also learn to master the body.  He told me, too, that I was using pain in the wrong way, and that was very bad."
~~Ralph Hart, Eleven Minutes, Paulo Coehlo
is it right
that I should have a rant
against you
who I asked for help
in my quiet moments
and then everything
fell apart
even worse than before?
Just crumbled in my hands
I’m sorry I asked
what happened
to the whole
he won’t hand you a snake
if you ask for candy
or however the fuck that goes
and yes fuck
that seems to be
my adjective
for fucking everything
this week
and maybe the next
unless I keep my mouth shut
and just be fucking happy
with what I have


Friday, October 1, 2010

do you have any pictures
of Jesus
in lotus position
she asks
I find some
on the internet
then I look up
at the print in my office
left by the woman
who sat here before me
of Jesus praying
in the garden
and I look over my shoulder
and see the painting of him
also not put here by me
and he says
I’ve been here all along
as if I were silly
to ever have thought otherwise.


Leben, Lieben, Lachen

December 4, 2009

So I'm driving home from work on a cold December night and the Classical radio DJ announces how isn't it funny that the German words for Laugh, Love, Live all begin with an L then launches into a beautiful German Waltz and I'm driving through the world and it's a big merry go round with lights and mirrors and beautifully painted horses we are all riding.  And it blasts out my windows out into the streets for all the bums and tired people that are on their way home.  It's a parade a big merry go round parade with an old Volkswagen Van leading in the front, then a white Mercedes, then my old Gretchen.  I want to start swerving to the music but I would hit the truck beside me so I pull into home and think isn't life funny--so funny.

Crossing Over

I have no time
I apologize
I have some beauty
to look at
I have some of this
to enjoy
and find a speck
of nitch in
I have a destiny
and a path
to begin following
that leads to
one point
within my soul
I have kindness to learn
to be reacquired
cool air to fill my nostrils
with on a fall morning
I have a bridge to cross
and I bid adieu
my friend
and wish you
everything good
and wish me
the great letting go
of all of you
who haunt my past
my present
but God forbid
my future